THE FOOLISH THINGS PEOPLE DO

The Things People Do:

In todays blog, I am going to comment on the foolishness of man and woman as it pertains to my own observations. Periodically I will continue to comment on other foolish things we do as a society. But I’m getting the ball started with Shoes on a Wire, Groundhog Day and Infant Vacations.

SHOES ON A WIRE
Ever since I was a young boy, I continually wondered who these foolish people are and why they would chose to toss their shoes on a telephone / electric wire in the neighborhood. I always thought that the wires had two purposes.

1. Providing electricity to the houses on the street.
2. Wireball (Homeruns if you hit the wire).

The fact that people are tossing their shoes on these wires leads me to believe that these foolish people are not long-term thinkers. The short-term joy is that you can proclaim your accomplishment of perfectly landing your shoes on the wire without the laces breaking loose but what these foolish people failed to recognize is that they must now walk home barefoot. Is there really a bragging factor about having to walk home barefoot?

Upon further investigating this matter it has come to my attention that there are other reasons for throwing your shoes on a wire. It is said that drug dealers mark their territory by putting shoes on a wire outside their “zone”, which leads me to believe that we have a serious drug issue in my neighborhood. It is also believed that shoes on a wire actually help give low flying planes better visuals. To which I say if a plane is really going that low then we got bigger problems then some hanging Nikes outside my home. Please foolish people. Leave your shoes where they belong….in those tiny cubbies outside the ball-pit at Chucky Cheese.

GROUNDHOG DAY
Whose stupid idea was this? Some obscure town in PA (Punxsutawney) has a population of 6,000 people but on this particular day (February 2^nd) it jumps to 30,000. For what purpose? To watch a rodent crawl out of it’s hole at 7:25am and look for its darn shadow thus becoming a weather predictor for the entire population of the US. There are so many things wrong with this day that it really makes me feel sad that people take days off from work, drive sometimes 24-hours just to see funny men in big hats expose an overhyped rat.

1. Let’s begin with the scientific perspective. We have Doppler radars, high powered barometers and satellites in space. All in total costing our government and local news affiliations possibly billions of dollars. What is this ferry ferret going to tell me that technology can’t?
2. We are waking up this fuzz-nut up at 7:25am. He is expected to be sharp and on his game in front of 30,000 witnesses and millions of viewers. That’s a lot of pressure? What if he gets tree-fright?
3. His shadow can be compromised by the lighting of all those unlucky news media and their camera lights whom are all stuck in that small town over the weekend instead of covering real news like Blago the Clown Governor of Illinois.
4. If you want a weather prediction then take my forecast. It’s going be cold until mid April. That’s the way it’s been the last 10 years. Its cold global warming foolish people. You don’t need a rat to predict that information.

INFANT VACATION

My last observation of the foolishness of man / woman is vacationing with an infant.
I like to think that I’m a well-traveled man and no matter where I go, there is always someone travelling with a crying baby. Whether it be an eco-tourist trip to Costa Rica, a tour of Hollywood homes in California, the tropic beaches of Maui or even ….dare I say it? Disney World. I truly believe that parents bring their infants for one of two simple reasons.

A. Its cheaper to bring their kids then pay a babysitter (kids get in free, fly free and eat for free).

B. These foolish parents think that other travelers enjoy the sounds of crying babies while enjoy their vacation.

I know this is going to sound hard to believe but I truly think that Disney is turning more into an adult vacation than a child vacation. I recognize that there are kid-themed rides resorts and floppy looking characters coming around to take pictures but this is the reality of your child. To them it’s not a vacation but the extension of their life. For adults, it’s a way to kick back, toss off that stuffy tie and have a week where they can find the kid in themselves. Furthermore there are loads of restaurants and nightspots that are for the over 21 crowd. But I digress from my original point about vacationing with infants is foolish.

There are reasons why kids fly free and get in for free in some places. It’s because they are too young and too small to appreciate these experiences. Here are my own rules of thumb about traveling with kids. If they have to be pushed around in a stroller throughout the duration of the vacation then they are not enjoying their vacation and neither are you.

Vacations are meant to be enjoyed and to create lifelong memories. When you are home a few weeks after your vacation and you ask your child what they liked most about it they should be able to give you a quick reply. If they are too young to talk or too young to remember it then you are a fool because you just wasted your time and money on a kid too young to appreciate. For that, you make into my category of the foolishness of man / woman.